Well, let me tell ya ’bout this strongest black tea, the kind that’ll knock your socks off, if you still wear socks, that is. I ain’t no fancy tea expert, mind you, but I know a thing or two about what makes a good cuppa. I’ve been drinkin’ tea since I was a little tyke.

Now, they got all these fancy names for tea, like SFTGFOP1, sounds like a cuss word to me, all them letters. And then there’s OP, which is better, less to remember. But let me tell you, all them letters don’t mean nothin’ if the tea don’t taste strong. I want somethin’ that’ll wake me up in the mornin’ and keep me goin’ all day long.

• They say Assam tea is some of the strongest. It comes from a place called Assam over in India. I ain’t never been there, but I heard it’s hot and muggy, just the kinda weather for growin’ strong tea.
• Then there’s that Golden Monkey tea, all fancy-like. I tried it once, pretty good, pretty strong, but not as strong as my regular stuff. Don’t care for all them fancy names much. Good tea is good tea, no matter what you call it.

See, this black tea, it ain’t like that weak green stuff. Green tea is like water, far as I’m concerned. Black tea is made from leaves that are all dried up and turned dark, I think they call it “oxidized.” Sounds like rust to me, but hey, whatever makes it strong, I’m all for it.

The best black tea, the really strongest black tea, is the kind that makes your eyes pop open and your tongue tingle. It’s gotta be dark, almost black as night, and it’s gotta have a smell that hits you right in the face. You know, that earthy smell, like dirt after a good rain. That’s the smell of real tea.

I don’t go for all that fussin’ and measurin’ neither. A good spoonful of tea in the pot, pour in some boilin’ water, let it sit for a bit, and there you go. Strong enough to stand a spoon up in it, that’s how I like it. And don’t go addin’ milk or sugar, that just ruins the taste. If you can’t handle strong tea, you might as well drink water. That’s what my old pappy used to say.

Now, some folks say you gotta use special water, filtered and all that. Baloney, I say. Water’s water. Just make sure it’s boilin’ hot. And don’t you go steeping the tea for too long, unless you want it so strong it’ll eat the enamel off your teeth. There’s a fine line between strong and bitter, you gotta learn to find it.

I get my tea from the store down the road, old Mr. Johnson’s place. He knows what I like, gets me the good stuff. He’s got all them fancy teas too, but I stick with my regular. Tried and true, that’s what I say. No need to go spendin’ a fortune on somethin’ you can get for a fair price down the road. And these big companies that put tea in little bags, that ain’t right. Tea’s gotta be loose, gotta have room to breathe, so to say.

So, if you want to find the strongest black tea, just remember what I told ya. Dark color, strong smell, and a taste that’ll knock you sideways. And don’t be afraid to experiment a little. Try different kinds, see what you like. But whatever you do, don’t go drinkin’ that weak stuff. Life’s too short for weak tea.

And another thing, don’t you go listenin’ to all them city folks and their fancy tea talk. They don’t know nothin’ about real tea. They drink it with their pinky fingers sticking out. Real tea drinkers hold the cup with both hands, and they ain’t afraid to slurp a little. That’s how you know it’s good and strong.

So there you have it. That’s what I know about this strongest black tea. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I gotta go put the kettle on. Talkin’ about tea always makes me thirsty for a good cuppa.

Strongest black tea, that’s what keeps me goin’. It’s the real deal. And don’t you forget it.

Tags: [strongest black tea, black tea, Assam tea, Golden Monkey tea, strong tea, tea, tea leaves, tea flavor, brewing tea, tea types]