Alright, let’s talk about this… uh… this face wash stuff. They call it “kale green tea spinach cleanser,” sounds fancy, huh? But don’t you worry, it ain’t rocket science. I’ll tell ya all about it, just like I’d tell my neighbor Bessie.

What’s in this stuff anyway?

Well, the name kinda gives it away, don’t it? It’s got kale, ya know, that leafy green stuff they put in salads now. And spinach, same deal. And green tea, which I heard is good for ya. Basically, it’s like a salad for your face, but don’t go eatin’ it! They say all them greens are packed with vitamins and stuff. Makes your face feel… I dunno… clean, I guess.

How do you use it, you ask?

• First off, your face gotta be dry. Don’t go splashin’ water on it yet.
• Then, you take a pump or two of this cleanser stuff. They say one or two, but I always do two, just to be sure, ya know?
• Rub it all over your face and neck. Yeah, your neck too! Don’t wanna have a clean face and a dirty neck, that’s just silly. Rub it in good, like you’re kneadin’ dough, but gentle-like. Don’t wanna scrub your face off!
• Now, you start addin’ a little water, little by little, while you keep rubbin’. They say do it for a whole minute, but I just kinda rub till it feels right.
• Finally, wash it all off. Splash water on your face, make sure all that green stuff is gone. Your face should feel kinda… slippery clean, if that makes sense.

Does it really work?

Well, I ain’t no spring chicken, but I gotta say, my face does feel better after I use it. Softer, maybe? And definitely cleaner. Especially if I been out gardenin’ all day, gettin’ all dusty and sweaty. It takes off all that dirt and… and makeup, if you wear that stuff. I don’t wear much myself, just a bit of rouge on Sundays for church. They say it’s good for takin’ off makeup, even that stubborn eye stuff.

Is it worth the money?

Now, that’s the real question, ain’t it? This stuff ain’t exactly cheap. But then again, good things usually ain’t. I reckon if you want a clean face and you don’t mind spendin’ a little extra, then yeah, it’s worth it. But if you’re happy with just plain ol’ soap and water, well, that’s fine too. To each their own, I always say. There’s plenty of other things to spend your money on, like good seeds for the garden or a new chicken coop.

Anything else I should know?

Hmm, let me think… Oh, yeah, they say it’s good for all skin types. I don’t know much about that “skin types” stuff, but I got sensitive skin, and it don’t bother me none. And they say it’s similar to some other fancy cleanser, somethin’ about “youth” somethin’ or other. But this one is cheaper, so that’s good. Always gotta look for a bargain, right? And remember, a little bit goes a long way. Don’t go squirtin’ half the bottle on your face at once, that’s just wasteful.

So, there you have it. That’s the lowdown on this kale green tea spinach cleanser stuff, from a plain ol’ woman who just wants a clean face. It ain’t magic, but it works pretty good. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I gotta go check on my tomatoes.

Where to get it?

You can buy it in them fancy stores or on that internet thing. I had my grandson order it for me online. He’s good with them computers. Just search for “kale green tea spinach cleanser” and you’ll find it.

Tags: kale cleanser, green tea cleanser, spinach cleanser, facial cleanser, natural cleanser, makeup remover, skin care, gentle cleanser, best cleanser, face wash